2009-09-30

The Demonick Diatribes – #3

I'm Hosed!

We can build a huge space station orbiting hundreds of miles above earth.  We can build hundreds of thousands of miles of gas, water, and oil pipelines crossing rivers and canyons, lakes and seas.  We can build airplanes to carry hundreds of passengers thousands of miles and others that fly over mach 3 17 miles high.  We can send probes to orbit the outer planets.  We can plumb millions of pubs and breweries as to leak nary a drop.  We can do all this, but we can't make a goddamnen hose that does not leak!

I have a suggestion for NASA, Lockheed, Boeing, Halliburton, Mobil Oil, and the Congress.  Let's set aside one day, say the next President's Day (it's a lame ass holiday anyway, but that is another diatribe), 15 February 2010, as "design a leak-proof hose" day - National DALPH Day.  On that day the best engineers in the country will work to design a leak-proof hose.  The best design will win the hearts of home owners across the globe.  The winners will be greenie weenie heros, saving billions of gallons of water a year, and more importantly saving me a few bucks when I forget to turn off the hose over the weekend.